5 stages of grief in mediation
Gary Webber gives insight into why mediations sometimes go on for a full day before an agreement is reached. He explains: “Those experienced in mediation know that the parties need to go through ‘the dance’ before a settlement can be reached.” He describes the 5 stages of grief in mediation that parties need to go through.
Why do mediations take so long – often all day? Sometimes the outcome seems fairly predictable. A solution is reached where an outside person might say: “That was obviously going to be the result from the outset, what took them so long?” Those experienced in mediation know that the parties need to go through “the dance” (as it is sometimes described) before a settlement can be reached. But why?
Often we answer that people need to be heard. Once they’ve been heard they manage to move from the emotional to the rational and to contemplate solutions. This all takes time. I think that there is also something else going on. Perhaps the parties need to go through what Kubler-Ross called the five stages of grief before they can move on towards a settlement?